Dominican grad: Suffering can be redemptive

By Kim Roberts
Clarion Herald

A routine wisdom tooth extraction more than two decades ago has taken 37-year-old Alexa Schexnaildre down a road of ongoing illnesses and surgeries, culminating in debilitating, chronic pain she endures daily. 

Schexnaildre has visited more than 100 doctors, had multiple hospital stays and surgeries and has lived with migraines, neck pain, immune system issues, severe nerve and muscle pain, food intolerances and GI issues, iron-handling complications, coagulation disorder, osteonecrosis of the jaw and anemia.

“I think the hardest thing that I’ve had to go through is the full-body muscle pain that I am living with now,” Schexnaildre said. “Throughout the years that I have been struggling with my health issues, I was also struggling with God and didn’t understand how he could let this happen to me for so long. We were all praying, and we weren’t getting what we were asking for. What I finally realized was that God was the only place I had to turn, but I was angry with him and with my situation and coming to grips with what my life was looking like and what I expected it to look like.”

Schexnaildre will share her journey April 11 at 7 p.m. at a Women of Faith gathering at St. Clement of Rome Church in Metairie.

“I’m excited to be presenting in my home parish,” Schexnaildre said. “This is the first talk that I’ve done that is open to the public, and I can’t wait to see what God does with this and who he calls to come.”

Her faith has grown

Schexnaildre is a cradle Catholic, having attended St. Rosalie Elementary and St. Mary’s Dominican High School. Before becoming ill, she regularly attended Mass, volunteered, was involved in church organizations and lived a full, active life.

“If you asked me how my faith life was before all this, I would say it was good,” she said. “But, there is nothing like long-term chronic suffering to really make you dig deep and ask the tough questions to realize how much you need to grow your faith. I realized I had much to learn, and that my faith was the only thing that would sustain me.”

In spite of her complex medical situation and suffering, Schexnaildre wants her message to be one of hope.

“I needed to go deeper with God and get to know him not only when things are going good, but when things are not good,” she said. “It’s easier in your faith when you say prayers and you get what you ask for, but harder when you don’t, and it keeps being a factor in your life.”

 Schexnaildre has used the pain and what has been taken away from her to draw herself into redemptive suffering and learning what she can do with this pain – while offering it up to Jesus. 

“I know that he redeems my pain, and it’s worth something and not a waste of all these years of my life,” Schexnaildre said. “I have drawn my focus onto God as other things in life have been removed. I can say I know him in a way I never could have before this suffering. 

“St. Paul talks about weakness being a gift, and it has been my desperation that has catapulted me on a completely different spiritual journey. I have grown so much spiritually. I still don’t like the pain and suffering and I’m not happy about it, but I am learning what I can do for him.”

While dealing with existing medical conditions, she developed anemia from an ongoing condition and reacted to medications and IV preparations. This required  compounded IV infusions that were not commercially produced. An out-of-state compounding pharmacy error worsened Schexnaildre’s condition, causing a never-before-documented medical issue. 

“There is no medical or scientific reason for me to be alive today, but I know God has a plan – I see his hand at work,” she said.

Spiritual direction helped

Schexnaildre has found spiritual direction to be a gift in her life – providing growth in understanding of the cross and redemptive suffering.

“Alexa is a living sign of the joy of the Gospel,” Schexnaildre’s spiritual director said. “Through suffering, she has learned the great power of the cross to redeem all things, and she has gained great insight into the purpose and true meaning of life in Christ. Her testimony is filled with light and a lived experience of the truths of our Catholic faith.”

“I have spiritual tools in my belt that I never would have had if this would not have happened,” Schexnaildre said. “I have been Catholic my whole life, but was not prepared to suffer. I didn’t have the spiritual tools to carry me through. God has shown me, along with spiritual direction, how to live. I was living on the surface in my faith and didn’t realize it.”

Schexnaildre shares her suffering and hope through www.forthegreaterpurpose.blog and speaking engagements at churches, retreats, missions, CYO gatherings, staff workshops, etc. 

“The point of my blogs and talks are to get people closer to God and to encourage their faith,” she said.

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